


The Struggle Availeth

by Hekate1308



Series: The Crowley Chronicles [45]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fix-It, Gen, Post-Finale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:47:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27914767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hekate1308/pseuds/Hekate1308
Summary: Really, it was no surprise that he considered driving Baby around in (apparently new, improved) Heaven (although he hadn’t had time to check it out yet – everything might still be as creepy as it had always been behind the scenes, but once more, he’d only realize that later) as a final and wonderful reprieve.At least, until he hit something.Or rather, someone.Crowley Survival Story, Post 15x20
Relationships: Crowley & Dean Winchester
Series: The Crowley Chronicles [45]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/844785
Comments: 6
Kudos: 25





	The Struggle Availeth

**Author's Note:**

> I am still angry at the finale, so I decided to fix it. Enjoy!

Peace.

Really, if he’d had time to think about it – which he hadn’t, since he’d been dying and all – he would have realized sooner that this had nothing to do with peace and everything, absolutely everything, to do with shock, pure and simple.

But with all the stuff that had been going done the last few weeks – first Cas – _Cas_ – then freedom – and – and –

God.

So really, it was no surprise that he considered driving Baby around in (apparently new, improved) heaven (although he hadn’t had time to check it out yet – everything might still be as creepy as it had always been behind the scenes, but once more, he’d only realize that later) as a final and wonderful reprieve.

At least, until he hit something.

Or rather, someone.

One second, he was driving down the never-ending highway, his mind still reeling from the goodbye to Sammy and the knowledge that apparently, everyone he’d ever loved was around (and wasn’t – yes wasn’t even in that thought something like regret, because of – because of that one – but no, why should he start remembering him now of all times) and that Cas seemed to be alright built for some reason hadn’t shown up – and the next – the next –

Despite Sam’s complaints about his driving, he had never had an accident that hadn’t been related to hunting and a ghost or some monster attacking Baby. He’d never even hit an animal.

So it was safe to say he hadn’t seen this coming.

Something dark and blurry appeared on the side of the road and barrelled straight into his car.

He stopped more out of instinct than anything else, staring at his cracked windshield.

How often had he fixed it in his lifetime? Did he really have to do so again now, when he –

When he –

The door opened and someone slid into the shotgun seat, rather flustered and annoyed. “Squirrel, I really have to say that you wee a much better driver when you were still breathing – “

It took him a few moments to register this new wrench that life – well, after-life – had thrown unto his path. “Crowley?”

“Did you expect anyone else?”

Truth be told, if he had expected anyone, it would have been Cas. Not that he hadn’t – well – it was complicated –

“So what are you doing here already?”

Finally he managed to gather his thoughts and come up with somewhat of an answer. “I could ask you the same thing.”

“Ni you can’t because God knows I have no business of being here whatsoever!”

It was then that he realized Crowley must be feeling profoundly uncomfortable – he was clearly agitated, and kept shifting in his seat – a far cry from the cocky, self-confident demon they’d gotten to know so well.

But of course. Crowley was right – he didn’t belong in Heaven.

Before he could say so, however, Crowley continued, “So how do we get out of here? Any chance you can just drive over the borders?”

“Get out of here`” he repeated.

“Well, what else were you going to do today? Drive around some more?”

Wasn’t that just the question. Bobby had said that Mom and Dad were down the road, but – that was complicated and didn’t sound very heavenly at all.

To be honest, he didn’t have any other plan than a vague idea that he would see Sam again one day, but that could take years – hell, eh wanted it to take years. He wanted Sammy to have a long, happy life…

It was then that he began to wonder why he wasn’t angry that he had never even been granted the _chance_ at something similar.

“A miracle! His brain is coming back online!” Crowley threw his hands in the air. “We can deal with the rest later, but for now, we –“

“But Heaven’s different now” he argued, feeling he had to. “Jack and Cas made sure –“

“Who?”

And that was how he found himself explaining, or rather, trying to explain everything that had happened in the last three years.

“So the spawn of Satan…” Crowley pinched the bride of his nose and sighed. “Explains why I’m here. He must have just pressed the big reset button when it comes to certain things. I probably slipped through the cracks.”

It made as much sense as anything in their lives ever had, and anyway – Dean was actually glad to see the demon, so he said nothing to that.

“And then he gave you freedom and it turns out that freedom means getting nailed and die not even three weeks in. And neither he nor your very own guardian angel thought it might be a good idea to interfere.”

“Freedom” he shrugged.” Freedom to live and freedom to die.”

Crowley snorted. “The freedom to die. Amazing.”

“Well, many people die young –“

“Squirrel, _I_ made it past 42 and I had a ticking clock hanging over me from my deal.”

“Technically I died first at –“

“And why should it stick now?”

That was indeed a question that Dean had some trouble answering. After all, Crowley was sort of right – while he had definitely done the right thing in trying to help Sam move on instead of running towards the nearest crossroads, it sounded rather strange to assume that this was indeed the end.

“Can we go now?”

Crowley was clearly not feeling better, and Dean thought about it for a few moments. He thought of Heaven having actually become an awesome place; of finally being at peace; at having a chance at seeing those they had lost again, maybe make things right with Mom and Dad…

And he glanced at Crowley and thought about how often they had betrayed one another and that he had still died for them.

And then he made a decision. “Alright. So? What do you think – what’s the best way out of here?”

* * *

While he was loathe to leave Baby behind, he was well aware that his real car was waiting downstairs, and anyway he didn’t think he could have driven back to earth.

“Sammy’ll have given me a hunter’s funeral” he suddenly recalled. “I won’t have a body.”

While he would quite like to get back, he wouldn’t enjoy ghosting around, he was sure.

“Don’t worry Squirrel, we’ll manage.”

He had no idea how or why, but he believed Crowley.

Fine then.

Time to go.

* * *

He didn’t say goodbye to anyone. He was pretty sure they would put the pieces when they didn’t see him around, and anyway, he wasn’t sure how they would have reacted to Crowley.

And so, instead of trying come to grips with eternity and meeting those he had thought he’d never see again, he followed a demon around Heaven, trying desperately to get out of it.

“Never saw what that whole peace thing was about” Crowley said conversationally. “I mean, doesn’t it mean the struggle not availath after all?”

“I’ve never really thought about it.”

Even now, when they had been “free”, it had been for such a short time that he hadn’t yet had the time to come to understand what that meant.

“I don’t like the feeling of this place” Crowley then said. As if his expression and the way he was holding himself weren’t enough of a giveaway.

“Yeah, well, pretty sure all of this wasn’t exactly made with the likes of you in mind” he answered, although he couldn’t help but feel a bit chaffed at that – Bobby had said Cas had helped with this new and improved Heaven, and Cas had known Crowley too. What was he doing these days, anyway? And why hadn’t he come to him after he had been brought back? After all, he had said – just before –

But that was another very complicated thing he had done best to ignore in the last few weeks.

“No one ever thinks of the demons” he sighed sarcastically, which Dean took as encouragement. At least he was still the same old Crowley he’d known so well.

“Now there has to be a door. There always are. Just think of Purgatory.”

He nodded; that made sense.

“And most likely as far away from the human souls around here as possible, otherwise earth would soon be swarmed with ghosts, and who’d want that?”

“Mediums, maybe? Give them a chance to actually connect with the spirit world?”

His joke fell flat, as he well knew, but it still felt ridiculously good to bicker with Crowley again. As a matter of fact, they were walking through the woods, like they had when they had been after the original hell hound…

“So you just woke up here?”

Crowley nodded. “Somewhere near the road you suddenly happened to drive by. Couldn’t believe my eyes, but of course, you and your brother are up here so often that they should just have installed revolving doors.”

“Yeah, well, I’m glad you were there.” He really was; it was a good thing Crowley had talked some sense into him. 41 really was no age to be rotting… or flying through the air as ashes.

As was to be expected, Crowley had no idea what to say to that and chose to remain silent.

After a while, Dean was more than ready to admit this: this place was huge. But that didn’t exactly help them…

“So we want to get out of here. I think it’s safe to say this Heaven wasn’t exactly build with that in mind.”

“How did you ever –“

“What I mean is, maybe we shouldn’t search for a door. Maybe we should just… go.”

“Do you really think anyone would be stupid enough to just… leave it all open!?”

He winced as he remembered. “Jack can be a bit… naïve.”

“So the one who’s in charge…” Crowley shook his head. “No, not going to go there. Let’s just go, please.”

And, before he could protest, he grabbed Dean’s arm and –

They were passing through some form of grey mist and –

Then they were there. Earth. As if nothing had happened.

Dean stared. “What the –“

“Since you pointed out to me that the new God can be naïve, I took the liberty of using some of that power Heaven had lying around that he apparently didn’t think worth his while to put away and made sure you had a body. You’re welcome.”

Dean was still getting used to having a heart beat and having to breathe again, but he still nodded at him. “Any chance you can get us –“

And then they were standing in front of the bunker. “Awesome.”

“Yes.” Crowell, surprisingly, still looked uncomfortable; it was explained when he continued, “I assume you want me to –“

“Give me a minute. Gotta bring down a few wardings.”

He enjoyed his – his friend’s (time to call a spade a spade, alright?) astonished expression and went to do just that.

Crowley had barely entered when Miracle showed up to jump up and down Dean’s legs and bark excitedly. He reached down to hug and poet him to both their heart’s content.

“Good boy. Did you miss me?”

He barked some more, and Dean wondered how Sam could miss all this ruckus. “I’ll go check up on Sammy. Now, Miracle, this is Crowley. He’s a demon, so he might smell a bit like sulphur, but he’s alright, alright? So no –“

But he was already enjoying an ear rub from Crowley.

“Traitor” he muttered with a smile on his face as he went to search for his brother.

He should probably have expected to find him black-out drunk; he sighed and di his best to make him comfortable. “God damn it, Sammy, when are either of us going to learn?”

Well; they had time for that now.

When he returned to the war room, he believed Miracle was still jumping around on his own, but then he realized –

“Crowley?”

“You get your dog, I get to keep mine!”

He looked at their normal dog and the hell hound playing. “Fine. She can stay.”

Belatedly, he realized he had no yet told Crowley he could do so, but there, on the table, was the demon’s name carefully carved unto it already, so who was he to argue with that?

And therefore, instead of starting a fruitless argument, he made dinner.

* * *

Sammy was still out cold at breakfast time next day, but Dean, who was after all an expert on such things, thought he’d regain consciousness sooner rather than later, and so started making toast.

“You do know he probably won’t want to eat for… at least half a day or so?” Crowley, who was busy giving Miracle and Juliet treats, asked.

“Yeah, but he should” he said lightly just as his brother came stumbling into the kitchen, looking like he’d been through the wringer.

“Good morning, Moose. Squirrel and I decided we weren’t ready for eternity at the pearly gates yet. You remember Juliet?”

He was blinking and staring blindly at the scene in font of him.

Dean flashed him a reassuring smile. “Heya, Sammy.”


End file.
